


Breath of Life

by Laurana117



Category: Thor - All Media Types
Genre: AU, Clans, Friends to Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Violence, War
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-24
Updated: 2015-08-02
Packaged: 2018-04-11 00:33:26
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 17,620
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4413992
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Laurana117/pseuds/Laurana117
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In a world full of clans at war the two most powerful, the Aesir and the Jotnar are at war with each other. Thor, wanting to get away from it all hides in the forest and makes a new friend. Not knowing that the boy is from his rival clan.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I didn't mean to write this. It just happened I swear.  
> This is lightly based off of the Madara/Hashirama arc in Naruto. (I'm a fan of them, not much else in Naruto).

Thor was hiding in the bushes near the riverbank watching a boy. Thor was not usually one for being creepy and watching people without their consent, but this was an exception. Because this boy was the prettiest boy Thor had ever seen.

He looked to be Thor’s age. But he was a lot skinnier than Thor. He was really pale and had the blackest hair Thor had ever seen. No one in the Aesir tribe had black hair.

Thor wondered if the other boy had to fight in the wars. Thor’s own father Odin, hadn’t let Thor join in any of the dangerous battles. After Tyr had been killed at the age of twelve and Frigga had cried every day for a year Odin had opted to take the more seasoned warriors into battle.

Especially against the Jotnar.

The Jotnar was a fearsome clan. They had varying abilities that could all be used to kill people. Thor had not been allowed anywhere near a battle with them because they were so good at killing.

They could turn their eyes red, using some unholy process called ‘seidr’ and once their seidr was activated they could use their eyes for a variety of attacks. Some of the best warriors among them could see in the dark, some could see attacks before others made them, and some could cast illusions with nothing other than eye contact.

The seidr also embodied itself in their hands. Jotnar could make their hands become freezing, and anything they touched froze. It was called the freezing death. The Aesir had needed to develop ways that they could heal from frost bite.

Over time, Thor’s clan, the Aesir had developed a seidr of their own. With their seidr they could heal each other and use it for varying purposes as well. Some could only heal while others had their seidr develop in completely different ways.

Thor’s seidr was growing to be the strongest. But he could barely control it. If he was feeling strong emotions, the sky above him sometimes reflected it. He could summon rain and lightning, or hail and sleet almost at will. Thor’s seidr allowed his emotions to control the weather.

The other children were terrified of him. He was too dangerous. Odin needed to destroy Thor before Thor destroyed them with his nasty temper. But Odin would never kill a son.

Odin also took care to keep Thor away from the fights as his uncontrollable seidr could prove to be a hindrance.

But while Thor’s clan didn’t allow the young to fight others weren’t the same way. So the boy in front of Thor might have fought in several battles.

He was leaning against a tree casually. And in his lap sat a book. He looked almost peaceful as he sat there reading. Like the rest of the world wasn’t at war.

Thor stepped out of the shadows, and instantly the boy had a knife in hand.

“Who are you and what do you want?” He asked in a deep silky voice.

Thor raised his hands. “I don’t mean you any harm.” He said with a smile.

The boy raised an eyebrow. “Then why were you hiding?”

“I was surprised to see you. I didn’t know anyone knew about this place.” Thor said. “I like to come here during the day.”

This little creek was Thor’s favorite place. It was always sunny, and it always made his mood better. Which is why it was always sunny.

“Me too.” The boy said as he put his knife away. “I can’t read anywhere else hardly. I always have to train or spar. It gets boring.”

Thor actually liked training and sparring. But since everyone always let him win he didn’t like doing it with the Aesir. But this boy couldn’t immediately tell which clan Thor was from. Thor was wearing loose unidentifiable clothing with no marker or indication that he was from the Aesir on it.

The boy had done so as well. There was no way to tell which clan he was from either.

“I’m Loki.” The boy said. “I won’t say my last name.”

Thor sat down next to him. “I’m Thor.”

The name Loki didn’t ring a bell anywhere, and Thor hoped that meant he was from a minor clan and not a large one like the Vanir or the dreaded Jotnar.

Thor looked at the boy again and noticed that he had a gold band on his left arm. He was in a green sleeveless shirt, and the arm band was on display. It was gold, and it looked like a serpent had curled around his arm. Only the serpent’s tail was in its mouth, making it a perfect circle.

“Don’t make fun of me.” Loki said as he covered the band. “All my friends think it’s girly to wear gold or jewelry.” His face was flushed as he looked away from Thor and shut his book.

“I don’t think it’s girly.” Thor offered. “I was just admiring the quality. It is very beautiful.”

Loki turned to look at Thor and Thor was mesmerized by how green his eyes were. They were so pretty. But then again Loki was really pretty.

Maybe Loki felt unhappy in his clan. Just like everyone was scared of Thor, maybe Loki’s clan didn’t like how delicate Loki was.

Thor hoped that was the case. Because the thought of Loki in battle scared him a little. Loki didn’t have half the muscle mass that Thor had, nor did he look like he had handled many weapons.

“What are you reading?” Thor asked as he looked down at the book.

“It’s nothing. Just a few short stories.” Loki said as he pushed the book against his chest and hid the cover from Thor.

“Oh come now. You can’t tell me that you sneak all the way out here just to read short stories.” Thor said as he tried to pry it away.

Loki turned his head up snootily. “It’s none of your business what I read.”

Thor found himself laughing. No one in his clan cared to read. They much preferred action.

Thor managed to get it out of Loki’s hands and then he stood and held it out of Loki’s reach.

“It’s a bunch of fairy tales.” Thor said as he flipped through it.

Loki was jumping and trying to reach it. And it was one of the most endearing things Thor had ever seen. He hoped that Loki kept this innocence about him. Because war had a way of making people emptier and hollower. Replacing their happiness with sadness.

Loki tackled Thor then and pushed him down on the ground. Thor laughed and relinquished the book.

“You’re stronger than you look.” Thor said as he sat up.

Loki’s eyes widened for a second. Like he hadn’t heard that before. Then he looked all haughty as he said, “Well that’s what you get for making assumptions.”

Thor laughed and wrestled Loki again. “What assumptions? You’re so little!” He said happily as he managed to get on top.

Loki frowned. “Well some of us don’t need bulk to be strong.” He hit Thor on the head with the book lightly.

Thor only laughed and sat up letting Loki do the same.

“I do have to admit though. You’re not as brutish as you look.” Loki said as he brushed himself off.

Thor smiled at the half compliment. “Thank you.” He said.

“Now sit down.” Loki said. “I’ll read you a fairy tale.”

Thor did as he was told and sat next to Loki. He suppressed another smile when Loki leaned against him and opened the book. None of the other fifteen year olds liked getting this close to Thor. It was too unpredictable, what if you accidentally poked Thor and got struck by lightning.

But Loki didn’t have to know about Thor’s secret. To Loki, Thor wanted to appear as a normal fifteen year old.

Loki agreed to meet with him again, and that night when Thor went home he had the biggest smile on his face.

Baldur, Thor’s eleven year old brother asked countless times why Thor was so happy. But Thor refused to tell him. Some secrets were better off kept secret.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thor doesn't get it

Two days later Thor and Loki met up again. Loki brought another book which he read to Thor out of. Thor had never really cared about books before. But Loki made them fun and not boring. They sparred a bit and read a bit and it made Thor really happy. The weather was wonderful that day, no doubt due to Thor’s good mood.

Thor also noticed that Loki had laugh lines. Thor decided that they were one of his favorite things.

But a day after that, Thor was eating breakfast with his Mother Frigga, and his two brothers Hodr and Baldur.

When their father stormed in and helped himself to a heaping bowl of last night’s roast.

“What is the matter?” Frigga asked calmly.

“It’s that damned Laufey! He’s such a monster!” Odin roared.

Laufey was the head of the Jotnar. He was a feared warrior. And Odin’s rival.

“What has he done now?” Frigga asked.

“He’s letting his second son join in the battles! Yesterday they fought with the Vanir. And according to the reports, his second son is no older than Thor and responsible for a large part of the victory. Why does he think he can send children into battle!?” Odin yelled.

Disgust passed over Frigga’s face. “What a horrible man.” She said. “A child’s place is at home.”

“Laufeys been losing it ever since Farbauti died last year.” Hodr said. “He hasn’t been the same. I expect his oldest son to take the Jotnar over any day now.”

Hodr was three years older than Thor. He was allowed to take part in the battles and know secret information. Hodr also got to meet with the elders along with Odin. It didn’t feel fair. But every time Hodr went with their father into battle Thor had to watch his Mother’s tears return and he didn’t want to cause her anymore pain.

“Farbauti was kind.” Frigga reprimanded. “And she died in childbirth. There is nothing dishonorable about such a death Hodr.”

Hodr looked away. Chastised.

Laufey’s wife Farbauti had died in childbirth a year ago. And the Jotnar had been unstable since then. According to reports. And now Laufey was letting his younger son join in the fighting. Thor’s stomach turned at the thought of what he would do if his Father sent him into battle. Especially if he didn’t have a Mother to return to.

Thor didn’t want to live in a world where clans needed to breed to keep producing warriors. And Thor hated that there were teenagers and children fighting adult’s battles. It made his stomach turn.

The next day Thor met up with Loki again.

Only Thor stopped in his tracks when he saw Loki.

Because the other boy looked terrible. He had large dark circles under his eyes, and his left forearm was in a bandage, and his right upper arm had a dark bruise on it. In short, Loki looked like he had been horribly beaten up.

“Loki!” Thor said sharply. “Are you all right?”

Loki opened his eyes and looked up. “Yes of course.” He said and his face was in a half smile. Like he thought Thor’s worry was funny. “I don’t think I can spar with you today though.”

Thor nodded as he sat next to Loki in the shade. Thor’s hands danced over the bandage. Feeling underneath.

“What happened?” Thor asked.

“I was careless and got cut.” Loki said as he blew a piece of his black hair out of his face.

“Were you in a fight?” Thor asked as his fingers itched to heal the wound. But he couldn’t. Because then Loki would know what clan Thor was from.

“You could say so. It was in battle. Someone took a swing at my brother and I stopped them.” Loki looked pretty proud of himself. “They never saw me kill them.” He looked gleeful.

Thor looked down sadly. What a sad world where someone his age had to go into battle.

Thor sat next to Loki. “Here, I’ll read today. You just relax. And when you go home, find some quiet and rest. You look like you need it. Also, put some hyacinth extract on the cut. It will help it heal faster and not get infected. Some cooking oil should keep it from scarring.” Thor advised as he pulled Loki against his side.

“How do you know so much about healing?” Loki asked.

“My Mother is a healer.” Thor said proudly. “Now tell me, what book have you brought today?”

Loki brought the book out and set it on Thor’s lap before he snuggled into Thor’s side. “You’re so warm.” Loki said. “And so comfortable. My Father said that the cut wasn’t deep enough to warrant time off. He wouldn’t coddle me like this.”

“This will be our secret then.” Thor said.

Thor couldn’t imagine sending Loki into any kind of battle situation. Especially as bruised and banged up he was. What kind of man was Loki’s Father? If he was okay with just sending Loki to fight?

After that Thor asked his Father if he could start training with Hodr and his friends. Thor wanted to grow strong too.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Childhood dreams and cold hands

Over the next several weeks Thor and Loki met up every two days at their little creek in the forest. Thor hated every time Loki showed up banged up or cut. Because that meant that Loki was battling.

Thor trained with Hodr and all his friends and began to finally gain some semblance of control over his own seidr.

Thor began to resent his own situation. He was kept safe in his clan’s camp, while Loki was sent out time after time to fight.

Thor’s own Father was suffering a great deal of stress. War between the Aesir and the Jotnar was imminent. And every morning he showed up with more stress lines on his face.

One morning in particular Odin looked worse for wear. So did Hodr.

“What happened?” Thor and Frigga both asked.

“There was a skirmish last night.” Odin said. “Between us and the Jotnar.”

Thor’s heart sank. War would break out again. He hated war. It meant that he had to heal so many broken people. It was so senseless! Why wouldn’t Laufey respond to their ceasefire attempts?

Thor quickly looked both of them over to see if they had any wounds. He only saw some light bruising and for some reason Hodr’s shoes looked singed.

“We battled with Laufey’s second son.” Hodr said as he scrubbed a hand over his face. “He is the strongest of them. There is no doubt.”

“Why is that?” Thor asked curiously. Laufey’s second son was his age, how could someone fifteen make Hodr look that worn out?

“His illusory powers are incredible.” Odin said as his mind no doubt replayed the night before. “His Freezing Death is fully developed. He can see in the night. And he breathes fire.”

Thor dropped his spoon. Fire breathing? There was never a Jotunn that could breathe fire before this. It was impossible! They froze things! How could one of them both freeze and breathe fire? What kind of foe was this?

“Neither of you will face him in battle.” Odin said to Baldur and Thor. “He’s unstoppable.”

Thor felt a chill run down his spine. This second son of Laufey. If he truly was this dangerous then Thor didn’t want anyone facing him. He didn’t want to lose anymore Aesir to this senseless violence. Thor wondered idly if the fellow youth would agree with him.

That day Thor found Loki skipping stones on the little creek.

“No book today?” Thor asked as he walked over.

“I’m too keyed up.” Loki said. “I haven’t been able to sit still all day.”

Thor raised an eyebrow. “Is everything okay?”

“Of course.” Loki said.

Thor sat down. “Do you ever think that these wars aren’t worth it?” Thor asked.

“What do you mean?” Loki asked as he sat next to him.

“I mean all the fighting.” Thor said. “So much destruction. I hate it.” Thor said.

“But it’s the way it is.” Loki said. “We fight each other for no reason because we’re all too proud to make peace.”

“But does it have to be?” Thor asked. He looked over at Loki. “Today is the anniversary of my Brother’s death. He was killed in battle. He was so healthy and so smart. But because of a useless war with another clan he died.”

Thor noticed that he had tears pooling at his eyes and up above him some clouds were gathering. He quickly took a breath and tried to steady his emotions.

Loki’s hand settled on his arm. Thor almost recoiled from how cold it was. How strange that Loki's hands were so cold out in the sun.  But it was refreshing.

“I’m sorry.” Loki said. “I lost my Mother and my little sister recently.” Loki was looking down at the water and he looked sad too. “They didn’t die in battle. But my Father wanted my Mother to have more children because too many of us were dying. They both died and I hate it. But I don’t think there is a way to fix this.”

Thor’s hand closed around Loki’s. “When we’re older we should build a place to live. It should be permanent and not a camp.”

“Oh? And will it be safe from war?”

“Yes. And it will be a place where people don’t have to die unnecessarily.” Thor said. This had been a secret dream of his for years. He hadn’t told a single soul about it.

“And how are you going to do this?” Loki asked.

“I’m going to get strong enough that everyone in my clan will listen to me when I say that peace and not violence is the answer. I don’t want to lose my other brothers.” Thor said. “And all the clans can live together in peace.”

“And girls don’t have to have children they don’t want.” Loki said. “I’d like a place like that. I have a little brother, and I never want him on the battle field. But I think it is impossible. The hatred between clans is too powerful. No one can forgive each other. But it would be nice.”

“Then will you do it with me?”

“Excuse me?”

“I mean, will you grow strong enough and then demand peace?” Thor asked.

Thor didn’t know what clan Loki was from. But maybe someday they could reveal it to each other. And together they can make the world peaceful and change the endless cycle of killing.

“You’re a weird guy. But I’ll try my best.” Loki said. “I don’t know if I will be strong enough.”

With that Thor stood. “Then we should get stronger. So that when we’re older everyone will have to listen to us.”

Loki’s eyes were a bright shimmery green. Thor thought that it was hope in his eyes. Hope for a new world where children and women and everyone else would be safe from war. Where clans wouldn’t have to kill each other. And where their brothers would be safe from harm.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Breath of Love

The reports about the Jotnar and especially Laufey’s second son were only getting worse.

Apparently the fire-breather was leading attacks against the other clans now. He was an unstoppable force on the battlefield.

The fire-breather was responsible for the deaths of twenty adult men in Thor’s own clan. It was staggering that one so young was becoming a weapon so quickly. Thor hoped that one day the Jotunn war machine would see that there was no reason in the slaughter and he would make peace with Thor.

But with the ever long string of deaths attributed to him Thor had to wonder.

Today Loki was not in a good mood when Thor arrived.

Loki was throwing stones at the trees so hard and fast that they were embedding themselves into the bark. It looked like he had experience with throwing knives.

“What is the matter?” Thor asked.

“Nothing.” Loki said sharply as he threw a stone into the tree next to Thor.

“Now now. If you don’t tell me how ever will I make it better?” Thor asked fondly.

“Fine! It’s my stupid brother. He says that no one will take me seriously if I keep wearing jewelry.” Loki said as he sat down harshly. His arms were crossed and his face was creased. “I’ve been trying to talk with the best warriors about peace and my brother says that they’ll never take anything I say seriously if I wear jewelry.”

Loki looked up at Thor then with wide green eyes. There was so much emotion in them. “But I _like_ wearing jewelry. My armband was a gift from my Mother, and my circlet was a gift from my grandmother. And besides, how does wearing jewelry make me less of a man?”

Thor sat next to Loki. “It doesn’t.” He said. “Not at all. If he says that you wearing jewelry makes you less of a man than he is less of a man. Jewelry is supposed to be worn to showcase beauty. And you’re certainly beautiful.”

Loki was blushing then. “I wish everyone else thought that.”

Thor wrapped his arms around Loki. “I think you’re beautiful. And I like your jewelry. And I just listened to you and took you seriously. So that shows that your brother is wrong.”

“But you like me. You listen to what I say.” Loki say. “Not everyone is like that.”

“They should be.” Thor said as he nuzzled into Loki’s neck.

Loki giggled and tried to push Thor away. “I’ve been thinking about your plans to build a place where everyone is safe from war.” He changed the subject. “It’s been the only thing getting me through the days lately. I’ve had so many grisly duties and the thought that one day I could live without warfare is so wonderful.”

“Me too.” Thor said. “I think about it every day.”

“I feel a little selfish. But I don’t want to fight like this all the time.” Loki said. “I just want to read books and wear jewelry and I don’t want to kill anyone else.”

“I’ll make it happen just for you.” Thor said. “And when we build the place you can come live with me. I’ll let you wear whatever you want and read books all day.”

Loki’s eyes were glazed over. “That would be nice.” He said before he laid his head on Thor’s shoulder and shut his eyes.

Thor wondered when the last time Loki had slept was. Because the other boy was often jumpy after a battle and couldn’t sleep. Loki had been battling a lot lately.

That day when Thor went home he had a brilliant idea.

He found a nicely shaped stone outside his family’s house, and when his Mother was away helping a woman with childbirth Thor snuck into her rooms and stole a hook along with a thin strip of leather.

Thor sat on his bed or on the tree stump outside his house the next day and carved into the rock with a knife.

When Thor was done carving into the rock Thor used his hammer Mjolnir to put the hook into the rock and then a hot rock to seal the leather strip into the hook.

Thor had spent the last day making a pendant. Pendants such as this were usually given as a form of courtship.

Thor hoped Loki liked it.

When Thor found Loki he was sitting under a tree looking up into the leaves.

“Loki!” Thor called. “I have a gift for you.”

Loki sat up. They had never exchanged gifts before.

Thor took his home-made pendant out of his pocket and gave it to Loki.

“I made this for you.” Thor said as he blushed and looked away.

“Did you carve this?” Loki said as he looked at the runes Thor had carefully carved into it.

Thor nodded. “You don’t have to wear it if you don’t want to.”

Loki took it and put it around his neck. “It is beautiful.” He said with a smile. “Thank you.”

Thor smiled. “I’m glad you like it.”

“Thor. I’m going to do something right now. Don’t hurt me if you don’t like it.” Loki said.

Thor opened his mouth to ask what Loki was doing, but before Thor knew it Loki was wrapping his arms around Thor’s neck and pressing his lips against Thor’s.

Thor wrapped his arms around Loki’s waist and kissed him back.

When Thor’s tongue went into Loki’s mouth he noticed something strange. Loki’s tongue and mouth tasted like smoke. Maybe Loki liked cigarettes. Loki seemed to like Thor’s tongue in his mouth, because his own teased it and he moaned.

Thor shuddered and pushed Loki down on the ground and climbed on top of him. Loki seemed to really like that too, by the way he spread his legs enough for Thor to settle between them. Thor ground his hips down and against Loki’s making Loki throw his head back and moan as he wantonly rubbed his own hips against Thor’s.

After a few moments Thor raised his head from where he had been kissing at Loki’s neck.

“Loki! Loki, we can’t do this here.” Thor said as he cupped Loki’s face with a hand. “It’s not safe.”

Loki’s eyes were glazed with lust and his lips were swollen from kissing and he looked so beautiful. But out here in the forest was not the place to do this.

Loki sighed like he didn’t want to leave. And Thor didn’t want to leave either. He loved Loki and his smoky taste and his moans. But that fact that someone could happen across them out here made Thor fearful.

Loki sat up and straightened his clothes. “We will be continuing that sometime.” Loki said in an authoritative tone. “And I love the pendant too. It’s such a lovely gift.”

Thor smiled and wrapped Loki in a hug. “You’re lovely.” He said.

Thor felt Loki’s cold hands run up and down his arms and then his warm lips pressing into his face.

It was such a nice feeling.

Thor knew the time for it would come.

When Odin would say that Thor was ready to start fighting.

Frigga cried and cried when it happened.

But Thor accepted it. They were to do battle with the Vanir for no reason Thor could discern. But Thor figured that if he did well in battle then people would respect him when he brought forth his plan for peace.

The battle is a bloody affair. Thor swung Mjolnir again and again, while Hodr slashed down enemy after enemy with his swords. Thor used his lightning and his rain against the Vanir and the battle was a quick victory for the Aesir.

After that it is decided that Thor’s training will begin in earnest and he only grows stronger.

Thor shows up after the battle to meet Loki and the other boy instantly knew.

“You look rough.” Loki said. “Come sit down. Before you fall and drown.”

“It’s not that bad.” Thor said. “My Brother just got a little too overzealous when we were training.”

Loki raised a delicate brow. Like he knew Thor was lying to him. But he chose to ignore it in favor of not making them argue.

“Sit down.” Loki said.

Thor was confused. “Aren’t we going to spar?”

“Not in your state. It wouldn’t do any good. Take your shirt off. I’ll help with your knots.”

“I don’t have any!” Thor said. “I’m not stressed or anything, so I don’t have any tension.”

Loki laughed a delicate little laugh. “You’re so funny.” He said. “Now come. These are stressful times, it is not your fault.”

Thor did as he was told and sat in front of Loki with his skirt off.

“Don’t do anything weird.” Thor said. “We’re still out in the open.”

Thor felt Loki drape himself across Thor’s back. Loki’s lips were so warm where they pressed into a shoulder blade but his hands where they rested at Thor’s sides were absolutely freezing. It was a strangely enticing combination.

“I wouldn’t dream of it.” Loki purred. Then he raised himself up and placed his hands near Thor’s neck.

Thor knew he was risking a knife in the back by doing this. But strangely he didn’t care. Loki had earned his trust by now. Thor knew that Loki wouldn’t hurt him.

Loki’s chilly hands kneaded at the extremely tense muscles around Thor’s shoulders and gradually the muscles let go of their tension and relaxed under Loki’s touch.

Loki was humming a soft song as he worked. Thor thought that if he were a more knowledgeable man he could figure out which clan the lullaby was from. But he didn’t think he would like that answer. Not now when this felt so nice.

“No not tense at all.” Loki’s whisper was colored with fondness.

“Hmm.” Thor said.

Thor felt Loki’s fingers trail down his back until they stopped at a large white gash. It was obviously from a sword on a downward swing. Thor felt Loki’s fingers run over it.

“This is old.” Loki said.

“Indeed.” Thor murmured.

Thor had received the horrendous wound in one of his first battles. Back when he was Baldur’s age. His Father had brought him out to fight against a weak enemy. But the Northern Alf clan had proven to be stronger than usual and Thor had been horribly hurt. Frigga and another healer had had to spend two hours solely fixing Thor so that he wasn’t paralyzed or killed.

After that Odin had been much more lenient in letting Thor stay home with Frigga.

“I was careless.” Thor said in a repeat of Loki’s own words from before. “And I got cut.”

“This was more than a cut.” Loki said. And Thor could tell that Loki was sad. “What kind of world do we live in? Where children have to be hurt to make a point.”

Thor just shrugged. “It’s up to us to change it.”

Loki’s fingers went up to Thor’s hair and brushed his fingers through it.

“Your hair is so pretty. It’s unfair.” Loki said. “Mine isn’t pretty like it.”

“I like yours.” Thor said. “No one in my clan has black hair.”

Loki scoffed and pulled at Thor until he leaned back and his head was in Loki’s lap. Thor looked up at Loki with wide eyes.

“No one in my clan has such gold hair.” He said in a serious tone. Then he smiled down at Thor and Thor got to see his laugh lines. Thor noticed that Loki was wearing the pendant Thor had made him. It made Thor’s heart swell with pride.

Loki’s fingers went back into Thor’s hair and he started braiding little plaits into it.

“If someone sees us they’ll mistake us for women.” Thor said.

“They’ll be disappointed by your lack of breast.” Loki said as he ran a hand over Thor’s chest.

Thor laughed. And tried to hide the way his nipples had stiffened at Loki’s cold touch.

But Loki saw it anyway by the way he was smirking.

This moment was so peaceful. Thor hadn’t felt so at peace ever before. Maybe what he talked about with Loki could come true. Maybe they really could make peace.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Identities revealed. Bitter revelations.

Thor returned home happy as usual. But when he saw his Father he gave Odin a wide berth. Things were not well if Odin’s face was like that.

Thor found out why Odin was in a bad mood that night.

It was just after they had finished eating when Odin had leaned back and sent Frigga a look.

“Frigga, please take Baldur to bed. Hodr and I need to discuss something with Thor.”

Thor’s stomach dropped. This didn’t bode well. What could his Father possibly want to say to him?

Once they were alone Odin trained his one eye on Thor.

“Heimdall alerted me that you have been meeting up with a boy over the last few months.” Odin said.

Thor’s eyes were wide. So he had been found out. “It’s nothing bad, we’re just friends.” Thor said.

“It is bad Thor.” Hodr said.

“The boy you have been meeting belongs to the Jotnar.” Odin said.

Thor stopped breathing. Loki was a Jotunn. Loki was his sworn enemy. But he was also Thor’s best friend and more.

“More than that. He is the Fire-breather responsible for countless deaths in our own clan.” Hodr said.

Thor’s blood froze.

Loki was the fire-breather? Loki was a murderer? Loki had killed _that many people?_

It made sense now. Why Loki had been so stressed and so distracted the last few months. His Father had been sending him out into countless battles. Loki had seen more battle than Thor ever had.

It was hard for Thor to wrap his head around it. Loki, who had been so happy to lie beneath Thor and writhe and moan was actually the cold-hearted killer who had won battle after battle for the Jotnar? Loki, who liked books and sitting in the shade and wearing jewelry could breathe fire and cast the most powerful illusions?

“The next time you meet we will follow and help you kill him.” Hodr said. “We cannot allow him to live.”

A cold hand closed around Thor’s heart. He couldn’t let them kill Loki. He knew that absolutely could not happen. Loki was small and precious and was Thor’s dearest friend.

“Do not attack him without us.” Hodr said gravely. “You will lose.”

Thor swallowed as he looked up at them. He only nodded.

As an Aesir, especially the son of the Clan Head Thor should want Loki dead. Loki is the strongest member of the other clan, he is a huge threat to Thor and his family.

Yet Thor didn’t want it. He didn’t want anyone to hurt Loki.

Thor had to warn Loki somehow.

The next time they were set to meet Thor hurried faster in hopes that he could warn Loki in time.

Thor found Loki just arriving. Loki was standing beneath a tree enjoying the shade with his eyes closed. But when Loki saw Thor he had his arms open and his face was such a heartwarming and heartbreaking smile.

“Thor.” Loki sighed as he cupped Thor’s face.

Loki expected a kiss. But Thor couldn’t do it. Not with his Father and his Brother set to appear any second.

“Loki! Listen to me.” Thor said urgently as he grabbed Loki’s waist. “My Father and my Brother are on their way to hurt you, you have to leave here and you can’t come back. It’s not safe, please Loki, go back now.”

Loki’s face was awash with confusion. His big green eyes were wide as they looked at Thor. “What do you mean?” He asked.

Thor opened his mouth to say more, but then a knife whizzed through the air and hit a tree just over Loki’s shoulder.

Thor felt Loki push him away and when he looked at Loki’s face Thor’s heart broke when he saw that Loki’s brilliant green irises had been replaced with a crimson color. Loki was a Jotunn.

When Loki saw Odin his red eyes widened and he glared at Thor as he backed away from him.

“You! You’re an Aesir.” Loki said as he took a defensive position. “And you _knew_ I was a Jotunn! How long you scoundrel?”

“I didn’t know!” Thor said helplessly. But it was too late as Hodr was approaching Loki with a sword.

Loki’s face took on a deadly countenance Thor hadn’t seen before. It was like the Loki Thor had fallen in love with was gone and in its place stood someone else.

Thor’s eyes widened when he watched Loki take a deep breath and when he exhaled a fireball flew out and knocked Hodr back. Thankfully Hodr had brought a shield with him, so he didn’t get burnt. But then Loki kept launching fireballs at Hodr and Odin and Thor knew he had to intervene.

The clouds above the three of them grew dark and swirled, and Odin and Hodr didn’t notice. Occupied as they were with fighting Loki.

Loki was proving to be just as strong as the rumors. He shattered Hodr’s shield with his freezing death and then stepped close enough to make eye contact which was a mistake for Hodr. Thor watched helplessly as Hodr fell into the creek screaming a blood curdling scream and grabbing at his eyes, trying to stop the illusions. Odin grabbed Hodr and held him behind his shield just in time to dodge the fire Loki blew at them.

When Odin and Hodr were both standing in the little creek, Thor aimed a small band of lightning toward them. And one strike hit the water and Odin and Hodr instantly convulsed and fell down.

Thor pulled them both out and then looked up at Loki.

Loki was standing on the other side of the creek with betrayal all over his face. And as Thor looked, tears running down his face.

“How could you?” Loki said. “How could you deceive me so?” His voice made Thor want to cry. “Why would you let them hurt me? _I trusted you!_ What was that peace you talked about? _Was that a lie too_?”

“No!” Thor said fiercely. “I meant it! I tried to warn you! I never wanted you to be hurt! You have to believe me Loki! I would never hurt you!”

“Well looks like it’s all for shame now.” Loki said. “It’s sad. I’m going to be the Head of the Jotnar in a week. I was going to try and make your dream possible. But it doesn’t look like it can happen anymore. There really is too much hate.”

And with that Loki turned and left.

It was a year before they met again.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The power of hate and the irreversibility of death.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it took me so long to reply to comments yesterday. I had surgery and was wiped out all day yesterday.

The night after Loki walked away Thor sat on his bed in the room he shared with Baldur and he let the tears fall silently down his face.

He had failed. All Thor had wanted was peace. He’d promised Loki a new life. He had said that no matter what clan Loki was from they would make peace.

Now it would never happen. Loki had walked away.

Thor looked up from his tears when he saw his little brother Baldur standing next to the bed. Baldur’s blue eyes were brimmed with sadness.

Thor rubbed at his face. “Hello Baldur.” He said as he tried to get himself under control.

“Hodr told me about what happened.” Baldur said as he climbed into the bed with Thor. “The person you made the pendant for turned out to be the fire-breather.”

“Yes he did.” Thor said as he remembered Loki sending billows of flame at Hodr. Loki had been so powerful.

“At least he’s not a cannibal.” Baldur said hopefully. “And I’m sure if he apologized Father would forgive him.”

_At least he isn’t a cannibal._

Thor laughed weakly. “You’re right Baldur. He isn’t a cannibal. But Father hates him too much to forgive him for what he’s done. What his clan has done. He’s a Jotunn and we’re Aesir.” Thor said. “It is not possible.”

“But you’re crying! Father shouldn’t make you cry.” Baldur said.

“I’ll grow up and stop crying.” Thor said. “You don’t need to worry.”

Thor had to fill the time he had spent in the woods with new activities. He began to train longer hours, hoping that if he wore himself out he could sleep at night without terrifying dreams of green eyes turning red. But it didn’t work.

Thor went out in the nights when he couldn’t sleep and tried to perfect his own tempestuous seidr. It was a patient venture. For more often than not his melancholy feelings would bring forth rains and flood the Aesir camp.

Thor even stole into his Mother’s room one day and he borrowed one of her books and he sat down and read it. He couldn’t help missing Loki’s sharp voice as he did so.

Everything felt empty without Loki. Even Thor’s thunderstorms were lacking a certain bite they had had before. Without Loki in his life Thor just didn’t feel as strongly about things.

The only good thing in Thor’s life was Baldur. The little Aesir boy was growing fast and strong, and to Thor’s delight, he was starting to resemble Thor.

Hodr and Tyr both grew to resemble Odin greatly while Thor and Baldur looked like their mother Frigga.

The little lad seemed to know just when Thor was feeling the saddest during the months after Loki’s identity had been found out. Baldur had been the one to comfort Thor when the news had arrived that Loki had indeed become the head of the Jotnar.

Laufey died shortly after Loki became Clan head, and Loki had apparently had to fight his way through the other elite warriors in his clan until they accepted him as the leader.

That had been a bitter pill to swallow. Because of Thor’s cowardice he had lost the biggest chance he had ever had at making the world a safer place. If Thor had only managed to stop Odin and Hodr they might be well on the way to peace talks.

But instead they were locked in the stirrings of war.

Full out war broke a year later. Thor didn’t understand the details of _why_ but he hardly ever did. Apparently some people from Loki’s clan murdered a group of Aesir in the middle of the night in cold blood. And because of that Odin was going to war with Loki.

A week after Thor’s sixteenth birthday he was called in to battle with the Jotnar.

It would be a lie to say that Thor wasn’t scared. All his life he had been raised to fear the Jotnar. They are a horrible beastly race. They’ll rip him limb from limb, they’ll send him into an infinite illusion while they murder him slowly.

Thor didn’t sleep the night before the battle. He was too scared. But also giddy in a dark way. He would probably get to see Loki again.

Hodr helped Thor put his armor on and then they stood together in Hodr’s room for just a second. “We can win this. For Father. For Aesir.” Hodr said.

Thor bit his tongue as he nodded. How could murdering people he hardly knew, and fighting the only person who had made him feel so strongly possibly honor their Father?

Thor followed Hodr to the battle field, and there they waited until over the crest of the hill they saw it. A horde of pale people wearing black clothing, with dark hair. All dark browns and blacks. Loki hadn’t been lying when he said that no one in his clan was blonde.

Thor grasped Mjolnir’s handle tightly and prayed to his Grandfather’s spirit that nothing disastrous would happen.

Once the skirmish truly began, Thor called forth a powerful rain to make the fighting more difficult. The Aesir were now used to Thor’s storms, so they were prepared for the onslaught of water. But the Jotnar were not.

Thor swung his hammer and dodged several sword slashes, until through the curtain of his rains he saw a rush of fire.

He turned too slowly, because behind him Hodr was engulfed in it. He hadn’t had time to dodge, trapped as he was in Loki’s world of illusion.

Thor’s cry rang through the field as the rains doubled their intensity. Thor had to put the fire out. Hodr was at stake.

Through the smoke Thor saw Loki’s lithe form. His eyes were blazing a bloody red as he hurled throwing knives and fire at the Aesir. There was no doubt in who was leading the charge for the Jotnar. Thor’s heart hurt when he saw Loki.

He was still as beautiful as ever. And Thor’s dreams were hopeless.

Thor ran to where Hodr’s body was slumped over and steaming in the rain.

Hodr was scorched. There was no two ways about it. His armor was unusable, but his face. His face made Thor want to empty his stomach. When Thor felt at Hodr’s neck for a pulse Thor knew it was too late.

Hodr was dead.

Thor held Hodr’s body close and let the rain wash over both of them. Just like that Hodr had died.

Later Thor would wonder if it was Loki who killed Hodr. Could it have been the flames? Or had Hodr already been wounded?

The scent of burned flesh became a recurring motif in Thor’s dreams for a long time. As did hatred filled red eyes and dark clothing.

After Hodr died things went downhill. Odin raged around the house. Howling about how inhuman Loki was for slaying Hodr. Saying that he would never forgive the Jotnar for what they had done to him.

Thor too felt a hatred settle in his heart. Why did Loki kill Hodr? Did he not know that he was Thor’s brother? Did Thor’s friendship mean so little to Loki?

Thor wanted to remain hopeful that his friend was still there, under all the hate and anger. But Thor didn’t know.

The next battle Thor and Loki met directly. Thor had been fending off three Jotunns until through the midst of them a billow of fire trailed and they all jumped away and Thor only kept his eyebrows from the rains he summoned.

Through the haze Loki himself jumped and his sword clanged off of Thor’s. This was the first time they had seen each other face to face in a year and Thor wanted to cry.

Loki’s eyes were red and all Thor could see in them was a deadly killer. All traces of the boy Thor had loved were gone.

Their sword fight was short, because Thor made the mistake of looking directly into Loki’s eyes. The next thing Thor knew he was plunged into darkness and he felt something stab into his side. _A knife._

Later, when Thor was roused from the illusion Loki had cast on him he found that the knife wound had not been deep enough to be life threatening. Frigga was perplexed by it. Why wouldn’t the enemy kill Thor in his greatest moment of weakness?

That night while Thor lay awake in his bed he thought about Loki. Maybe Loki didn’t want to kill him. Maybe Loki still cared.

Maybe all hope was not lost.

After that it was decided that Thor should use his rains more often. For his tempestuous seidr was the only one that could combat Loki’s fires. Frigga had to learn very quickly how to heal burns. And even then, sometimes she was not quick enough and Loki scorched them.

Thor knew from reports that Loki’s clan was having to learn how to heal people from lightning strikes. And it sent an odd feeling of disgust and humor to Thor’s heart to think he was finally returning the feeling that Loki’s fire-breathing had caused.

The next battle they fought against each other was bloody. Loki brought two swords to fight with, as well as a large scythe that he would swing and slice into the Aesir while they ducked away from his flames.

Loki was growing stronger every battle, and it was terrifying.

Thor was too busy trying to keep Loki from killing Sif that he didn’t see Byleistr, Loki’s older brother engage Odin in battle.

Byleistr managed to wound Odin spectacularly before Hogunn stabbed him through the stomach and he fell.

Shortly after the battle Byleistr died.

And Odin was declared unfit to ever return to battle. It would be a miracle if he could walk after the attack from the oldest Laufeyson.

Thor became the Head of the Aesir.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The bitterest of rivals were best friends

An AllFather’s job is not easy. Especially if they have no idea what they are doing.

But Thor fell into his new responsibilities. As time passed, piece by piece Thor’s heart hardened. Each battle with the differing clans made his dreams seem impossible. Peace could not occur in such a world and Thor was starting to think it.

Every weapon Thor had was singed. All his nightmares were decorated with the garish illusions Loki had cast on him. And when Thor woke in the nights he could just imaging a pair of red eyes glowing in the dark ready to kill him.

Thor buried his Father when he was seventeen. Odin died of complications from the attack Byleistr had done.

After that Thor felt his hope going away. He would wake up in the mornings and look out his window and imagine if everything had gone differently if he could have made the peace between the Jotnar and Aesir possible.

Thor was eighteen when the cease fire he had sent to Loki was returned to him with blood and burn marks on it. Only Baldur saw Thor’s tears.

At nineteen years old the clan began to ask about marriage for Thor. But the subject just made him tired and want to sleep. Marriage meant children, and too many children died on the battlefield. Plus Thor didn’t think he would love anyone as much as he had loved Loki. It wouldn’t be fair to give anyone false hope.

Thor hated fighting Loki. They were both so powerful that they could not kill each other.

Thor thought about just setting Mjolnir down in the middle of a battle and letting Loki kill him. Because the way things were could not be counted as living. Counting everyday as a blessing was not the way Thor wanted to live. Keeping Baldur close like someone was going to take him away was not the way Thor wanted to spend Baldur’s youth.

But Thor knew that if he died the clan would fall into chaos. Baldur was not old enough to take the power of AllFather and no one else was strong enough to lead.

Thor was in a meeting with his best warriors when the subject of the Jotnar was brought up.

“Has Loki considered our most recent ceasefire?” Sif asked.

“He has not.” Thor said as he rubbed at his head. “All reports say that he is continuing the war.”

“Well then we need to think about our strategy.” Fandral said. “He’s just going to keep destroying us otherwise.”

“What do you suggest Thor?” Sif asked.

Thor sighed. “What we can.” He said. “Loki cannot be stopped. We should focus on increasing our healing capacity. If Loki continues to refuse our attempts at peace then we have to continue this.”

Thor looked down at his wrist. Where there was a long white gash. It was a scar from Loki’s scythe.

Thor sighed.

War takes the happiness out of people and replaces it with sadness.

Like clockwork within the week they were back on the battle field.

Loki was fighting like a madman again. With his flames and his scythe slicing through Thor’s men he was a horrifyingly arousing sight. He took on Sif and Fandral at once, scorching the first and throwing three knives at Fandral.

Thor saw them out of the corner of his eyes and made sure that they would live before he turned back to his own bloody duties.

The fight went by in flashes of lightning and blood until he heard a piercing scream. This one was different from any Thor had heard before.

It was Loki.

Thor turned quickly and saw that a little ways away Loki was clutching a body to his chest. Thor’s eyes widened and against his better judgement he walked closer.

It was a child Loki was holding. Probably around twelve years old. It had to be his younger brother Helblindi. Thor had heard little of Helblindi. Loki was wise to keep his little brother safe and away from prying eyes. Until now.

Thor’s heart broke as he heard Loki’s sobs. Behind them was the body of Volstagg. He must have been the one to wound Helblindi. And Loki had swiftly killed him.

Loki lifted his head to the sky and a great plume shot out of his mouth as he howled his grief to the heavens.

The ground beneath them began to shake and Thor knew that it was Loki’s doing.

Thor made his way across the shaking craggy ground until he kneeled next to them.

“Let me see him.” Thor said frantically.

Loki leveled his killer’s eyes at him and hugged Helblindi closer. At this range Thor could see that Helblindi was still alive, but his breathing was shallow. The boy needed immediate healing.

“Loki.” Thor said sharply. “I can heal him. Let me see him.”

His clan might question his sanity later, but Thor knew that he couldn’t let Helblindi die. Helblindi was just a child, he had no place on the battlefield. And Thor couldn’t stomach the idea of letting such a young soul die. He couldn’t imagine letting Baldur die in such a way and he couldn’t let Helblindi die. It didn’t matter if he was a Jotunn. Or if Loki had killed Hodr.

“Why would you do it?” Loki asked quietly. “I’ve killed so many of you! Hodr! You should be glad to see me grieve!” Loki’s eyes were streaming tears and up close Thor could see that he was covered in cuts and bruises.

“I will never celebrate your grieving.” Thor said sadly. “I cannot. And I cannot allow someone so young and so dear to you die. Please.”

Loki relinquished his hold on Helblindi and Thor used a knife to cut the shirt away. The boy had been stabbed in the heart and it was a really bad wound. Thor looked up at Loki. “Blast anyone that comes near us.” He ordered. “This will take time.”

Loki nodded through his tears and took watch around Thor and Helblindi.

Thor got to work. He summoned his most potent healing seidr and a needle and thread from his pocket and he stitched Helblindi back together.

It took half an hour, but by the end of it the skirmish was dying out and each side was pulling away. More than a few curious glances were sent their way but with a shot of flame from Loki they averted their gazes.

Thor’s hands were soaked with blood and his nostrils were burning from the stench of burning earth. But Helblindi was breathing normally and Loki wasn’t attacking Thor.

That was a good sign.

“Will he live?” Loki asked as he took Helblindi back into his arms.

“Yes. For now. But Loki, he cannot be on the battlefield! He is just a child!” Thor said harshly.

“I know that! He snuck here!” Loki screamed back and beneath them the earth shifted.

Thor steadied himself. “He won’t be hurt today.” He tried to soothe the other clan head.

“Why?” Loki asked as he cradled his little brother. “You won’t get anything out of this.”

Thor’s heart constricted. To think that Thor only saved Helblindi because he hoped to gain the upper hand. Had Loki forgotten all about their friendship?

“I just thought…” Thor started as he looked down at the little lad. Helblindi looked a lot like Loki’s deceased Mother Farbauti. He was almost as pretty as Loki himself, but Thor would forever be biased. “I just thought that maybe you could accept my ceasefire.”

Loki’s eyes were still red as blood. “That’s it?” He looked confused. “You could ask for anything right now and I would do it. Out of love for my brother.” Loki added the last part like he would have done it otherwise.

“Loki. I want what I have always wanted. I want peace. Please Loki, I don’t want to hate you like Odin hated Laufey. I don’t want to kill another Jotunn. Accept the ceasefire.”

Loki looked to be thinking it over deeply. “What if you’re planning my murder?”

“Never.” Thor said. “There are too many in your clan that support you unconditionally. If you die then all hope is lost.”

Loki shook his head. “There’s too much hate. Our clans cannot stop the fighting. It’s an impossible dream.”

Thor sighed and stood up. He looked down at his bloody hands and wanted to cry for the millionth time.

He turned around and looked at Loki kneeling among the charred bloody earth with his little brother’s healed body. Loki looked so human for the first time in four long years. For so long Loki had looked like a horrible murderer on the battlefield, but right now it was like his humanity had been returned.

“I’m serious about peace Loki.” Thor said quietly. “When I send the next ceasefire please show me that you are too.”

When Thor received a ceasefire agreement a week later he wept with happiness.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Uneasy peace

Peace talks began that year.

Sif and Fandral told Thor he was being a fool. No one could trust Loki, he was a murderer. He was a _Jotunn._

Baldur was the only one who supported Thor’s peace plan. “I think he is showing authenticity.” Baldur said intelligently to Thor’s friends. “I believe him.”

Thor didn’t know where Baldur’s trust stemmed from. He had never met the Jotnar leader. When Thor asked him Baldur just asked.

“I’m not a fool Thor. I can tell that you still love him. And if you do then he must be a good guy.” Baldur said. “And you saved his brother. He has to trust you now.”

“I wish it were so.” Thor said.

The Jotnar and the Aesir each sent a small delegation to the area between their encampments to decide peace.

Loki brought Skadi, the second fiercest warrior among the Jotnar, Angerboda his right hand man, and Jarnsaxa the meanest among them.

Thor brought Sif, Fandral and Hogunn.

Together they spent a week negotiating. Skadi seemed set on the idea that this was all a trap and that Thor was going to kill them all once Loki fell asleep. Angerboda wanted to learn the Aesir healing techniques and Jarnsaxa wanted a demilitarized zone.

Loki wanted reassurance. He wanted to know the truth, if all the Aesir gathered were there for peace.

Thor had never seen Loki looking so worn out. But sitting there with his red eyes and his weapons which he didn’t use, he looked like a real leader. He didn’t budge on anything he felt was too important but he did his best to compromise with Thor.

By the end of the week the alliance had been worked out. Thor morning on the last day was a beautiful one, and Thor took a stroll through the nearby forest. His heart was housing something delicate. A hope that this would all work out.

Thor noticed someone else was out too. Loki was standing beneath a tree with his eyes closed.

Had Loki slept at all since peace talks had started?

“How is Helblindi?” Thor asked as he stepped just outside the shade.

Loki opened his eyes and they were red. “He is well. He didn’t even wake up sore.”

Thor smiled softly as he looked at the sky. “That is good to hear.”

“The weather is good today.” Loki said as he too looked up. His tone made Thor think his statement had multiple meanings.

“I am hopeful.” Thor said simply as he smiled at Loki. “I have waited a long time for this.”

“Thor, I’m—“

“I know.” Thor said. “I know. I am too.” Softer.

While Loki still didn’t trust him enough to dissipate his optical seidr, Thor wasn’t offended. Loki was here. He was listening to them and he hadn’t killed anyone.

“When this is all over, I would like to see you again.” Thor said. “We don’t have to represent out clans. We can just be friends again.”

“I don’t know if that is possible.” Loki murmured.

Thor just sighed and walked away. Baby steps. “Let us return. Today is the last day of peace talks.” Thor turned to look right into Loki’s blood red irises. “Ally.”

Loki silently followed Thor back to the camps.

When Thor returned home with an alliance he celebrated with a simple dinner. He had Baldur and Frigga at the table with him and it almost felt like a family again.

“Your Father would be proud.” Frigga told Thor.

Thor didn’t know if that was true. But it was a nice sentiment.

“When is Clan head Laufeyson going to visit?” Baldur asked the next day.

Thor was taken aback. “Loki isn’t going to visit.”

“I think he is. You’re allies now, so you can visit each other all you want.” Baldur said.

“That is not how it works unfortunately.” Thor said. “We are both the leaders. We cannot take time off for friendly visits.”

_Although Thor had asked Loki to do so._

Strangely enough, Loki did come for a visit at the end of the week.

Baldur and Thor had just finished eating dinner when there was a knock at the door. Baldur raced to it while Thor got to cleaning up. Distantly Thor could hear Baldur opening the door.

“Hello!” Baldur said in a strange tone. “I don’t think we’ve met, I’m Baldur Thor’s little brother.” Baldur’s voice was bright.

“Hello. I’m Loki. The Head of the Jotnar.” Loki’s voice drifted in. “Is Thor here?”

“Yes he is! You just missed dinner, do you want anything?” Baldur said.

Thor could hear their voices getting closer as Baldur led Loki to him.

“I’m fine.” Loki said.

And then Thor turned around and Baldur and Loki were in the tiny kitchen. It was a nice sight.

Loki looked somehow tinier in Thor’s house. They weren’t on the battlefield, Loki wasn’t killing people and his eyes were green. That last fact made Thor smile. He hadn’t seen Loki’s green eyes in years.

“I told you he would visit.” Baldur declared. “Thor didn’t believe me but I knew it.”

Loki didn’t even look at Baldur. His gaze was trained on Thor.

“Would you like some tea?” Thor asked.

Loki nodded as he looked around curiously. They had been fighting for so long that it felt a little strange doing something so domestic together. Thor got to making the tea while Baldur chattered at Loki.

“I think you’re seidr is cool!” Baldur was saying. “It wasn’t cool before we were allied, but now that you won’t attack us it’s so cool to see it! I wish I could breathe fire. All I can do is see the future.”

“Your clan’s seidr is the most varied.” Loki said. “While mine is fairly routine. And seeing the future can often be handy.”

Baldur shrugged. “No one believes me. What about your little brother? Can he use seidr?”

Loki shook his head. “He cannot. Our optical abilities show up later in life, if they show up at all. Helblindi is too young.”

Thor set a cup of tea in front of Loki.

“Baldur, why don’t you go visit Mother while Loki and I talk.” Thor said.

Baldur didn’t look like he wanted to. But after Thor sent him a look he did as he was told.

Once they were alone Thor took a moment to really look at Loki. He didn’t look great. Loki still had dark marks under his eyes and he was too thin. And he just looked so sad sitting in Thor’s kitchen and fiddling with his teacup.

“Do you want something to eat?” Thor asked.

“No thank you.” Loki said.

Thor sat down next to Loki. “So what brings you?” He asked lightly, trying to make Loki look less serious.

“I wanted to apologize.” Loki said while looking down at his lap. “I’m sorry about Hodr.”

Thor fought off tears at the mention of his older brother. Was he mad at Loki for killing Hodr? Yes. But not really. He had never been able to hate Loki and they had been at war. Part of the alliance was that each clan had to forgive what happened during wartimes.

“I forgave you a long time ago.” Thor said. “It was war and you were just defending your clan. Much like I had had to do over the years.”

“I didn’t think that I would kill him.” Loki said. “I wasn’t that sadistic as to target your brother specifically.”

Thor let his head fall into his hands. “I know you didn’t.”

“So that was what I had to say, I’ll go now. If I leave I can make it back to Helblindi before dark.” Loki said as he stood up.

Thor reached out and grabbed his wrist lightly. Loki looked back at him with wide eyes.

“Is someone watching Helblindi?” Thor asked.

“Angerboda.”

“Then can you stay a bit longer?”

Loki nodded and sat back down.

“I wanted to apologize too. For that day at the river. I was a coward who wasn’t able to tell my Father what I wanted and I have suffered for it every day since then.” Thor said. “I truly never knew who you were until that day, and then it made no difference. You are Loki whether you are breathing fire and shaking the Earth or just sitting and reading books. And I will always love you.”

Thor looked up at Loki and his mouth was hanging open.

“How can you say that?” Loki asked.

“How can I not? You were the first person to truly accept me. I didn’t feel like a freak around you. And there hasn’t been anyone since you.” Thor said.

Thor hadn’t been able to take anyone else into his bed because of how temporary life had felt. He could’ve died any day. And it didn’t feel right with anyone other than Loki.

“I’ve killed so many of you.” Loki said, “And you’ve killed so many Jotnar. Is it even possible for us to forgive each other in the wake of it all?”

Thor got up and stepped around the table until he was kneeling in front of Loki. “It will take time.” Thor admitted. “But I am hopeful.”

Then he leaned forward and pressed his lips into Loki’s.

Thor felt Loki’s hands reach up to clutch at him like a lifeline as Loki returned the kiss. It didn’t feel worth it, all the years all the fighting, all the deaths. But for this singular moment it was forgotten.

Thor’s tongue swept into Loki’s mouth and it still tasted like smoke, but it was also like tea and just Loki. Thor had missed it. Thor grabbed each of Loki’s thighs and lifted him up easily, and Loki held on.

Loki’s face was completely red when Thor set him down on the bed. When Thor joined him on the soft surface Loki pushed him back gently.

“I don’t know if I can.” Loki choked out as his eyes filled with tears. “I’m not like I was, I’m all—“

“Shh. It’s okay.” Thor said. “We don’t have to do anything.”

Thor understood what Loki couldn’t quite say. After all the deaths they had seen it was hard to have sex. Thor had a hard time not being sad after all the blood on his hands from healing his broken clan members. Loki must be the same way. The last time they had done anything similar to sex they had both been more carefree.

Thor embraced Loki and just held him. Loki’s cold fingers grabbing onto Thor’s shirt as they hugged. Loki’s sobs were breathed into Thor’s neck.

“I thought that I would die before I got to do this again.” Loki murmured.

“I did too.” Thor whispered.

After Loki’s tears had subsided he started pressing chaste kisses into the side of Thor’s neck. That had probably been the first time Loki had cried in front of someone since his Mother had died. Thor just held him closer for it.

Eventually Loki shrugged out of his long sleeved shirt and pants and settled in bed with Thor in just his underclothes. Thor quickly followed suit and did the same.

“I have nightmares.” Loki murmured in the dark as he pulled Thor’s covers closer. “I might kick you.”

“I have nightmares too.” Thor said. “I might strike you with lightning.”

“You only use lightning when you’re angry.” Loki murmured as a cold hand slithered over to rest on Thor’s side. Like Loki didn’t want to be separated from him.

“Or when I’m aroused.” Thor laughed as Loki’s cold fingers tickled his ribs. He reached a hand over and pulled Loki over.

“You know.” Thor began as his eyes were finally suited to the darkness. He could just barely make out Loki’s face in the dim light. “I was serious when I was fifteen. I want to make a place where our clans could be safe. The Aesir and the Jotnar could live together. And other clans could join us if they wanted to.”

“Pillow talk is supposed to be after sex if I remember correctly.”

“We’ll get to that. Eventually.” Thor promised. “But would you think about it? Our people would be safer if they lived together. We could protect each other. And you could move in with me.”

“Our people would murder each other. And I can’t move in with you. I have Helblindi to care for.” Loki said.

“I think our people would get along beautifully. I saw Jarnsaxa looking at Sif with doe eyes all through the conference. And Helblindi could live with us too.”

“Jarnsaxa was thinking about killing Sif no doubt.” Loki yawned and burrowed closer. “Helblindi would rather die than live with an Aesir.”

“Oh you Jotnar. Always wanting the world to think you’re plotting murder. But I know the truth.” Thor whispered.

“Enlighten me.” Loki’s voice was getting relaxed with sleep as his breathing turned rhythmic.

“You enjoy big warm beds.” Thor whispered into Loki’s ear.

Loki just said, “Hmm.” Because he was peacefully sleeping.

That night Thor didn’t dream of red eyes waiting to kill him.

The next morning Thor woke up with Loki’s head pillowed on his arm and Loki’s arm wrapped around his waist. Loki looked so peaceful when he slept.

Thor shifted too loudly and the next thing he knew Loki was sitting up quickly and his eyes were red. His hand was at Thor’s throat and smoke billowed out of his mouth before he realized where he was.

Thor stayed absolutely still and let Loki calm down. Loki ended up pressed against the wall with his eyes still blazing.

“Are you alright?” Loki asked as he looked Thor over.

“Absolutely.” Thor said cheerfully. Then he raised his arms up to Loki. “Come back, it’s fine I promise.”

Loki relaxed each muscle and crawled across the bed until he was back pressed against Thor’s side. His eyes were still red though. Blazing right into Thor.

“Does it sting? When you use your optical seidr?” Thor asked as the settled back down.

“No, not at all.” Loki said as the red receded. “It sharpens my vision, allows me to see in the dark and I can put people into illusions.”

“I am very aware of that last one.”

“I’m sorry.”

Instead of responding verbally Thor leaned over and kissed Loki deeply. He tasted of smoke much more so, after his wakeup.

The kissing seemed to do the last bit of relaxing for Loki and he melted into Thor’s embrace.

Just like when they were younger Thor ended up on top with Loki’s arms wrapped around his neck. Loki’s fingers were still incredibly cold even though the rest of him was flushed.

Thor’s hand found its way beneath Loki’s sleeping pants and Loki’s moan was deep and warm against Thor’s ear. Loki’s moan turned to a high pitched whine when Thor’s fingers wrapped around his erection.

Loki bucked up into Thor’s hand as Thor stroked. And after a few moments Loki’s climax washed over him and Thor swore he felt the Earth shake a little beneath them. “I love you.” Thor told Loki quietly.

Loki smirked up at him and his own hands found Thor’s erection. Thor had never expected to be so aroused by the feeling of freezing fingers stroking him, or the taste of smoke on Loki’s breath. But it was all wonderful and Thor found himself climaxing in moments.

They lay together in a post-orgasmic bliss for a few moments and Thor pretended that they weren’t the leaders of rival but now allied clans. They were just lovers.

Thor let his hand circle the back of Loki’s neck as he pulled him close for more kisses. “Think about what I said?” He asked gently.

Loki’s eyes had regained some of their lost brightness as he looked back at Thor. “I will.” He whispered.

And that was all Thor could ask.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Long disputed happiness

Loki eventually did tell his clan about Thor’s plans. And even though the peace between them was a new fragile thing Thor wore them down over the years. He taught some of the Jotunn Aesir healing techniques in secret and won the favor of the clan.

Meanwhile Loki was winning the favor of Thor’s clan only he didn’t realize it. Every time there was a threat to the Aesir Loki gathered a small group of Jotnar as well as himself and they went to the Aesir’s defense. It was beautiful.

And fighting beside Loki was one of the best experiences in Thor’s life. Instead of fighting each other in a stalemate when Thor and Loki fought side by side no one could defeat them. In great swirls of fire and lightning Thor and Loki managed to win each battle.

And so it happened, two years later that the Jotnar agreed to live closer to the Aesir in a settlement.

Loki and Helblindi both moved in with Thor and Baldur and Thor had never been so happy.

Helblindi was so much younger than Baldur, clinging to Loki’s arm like he didn’t know if he could live this close to the Aesir leader. But when Loki showed that Thor really was harmless Helblindi began to warm up.

Thor loved cooking for Loki and attending meetings about the future of their settlement together and gradually Loki stopped looking so broken. His light returned a little each day and maybe someday he wouldn’t look so haunted by everything.

Eventually things between the Jotnar and the Aesir calmed down and each clan settled into its place in their society. Sif even stopped trying to kill Jarnsaxa secretly and asked him to accompany her on walks through the forest.

Thor was just so happy.

The years passed in a blur of happiness, and before Thor knew it he and Loki were in their middle ages and famous for more than their legendary abilities. They were known as the ones who brought peace into the world. The Jotnar and Aesir leaders who forgave each other and put aside their hate for their people.

Freya, the female leader of the Vanir joined their alliance a few years after they had started living together. It was difficult at first, joining all three of their clans but they worked it out.

At first Thor had really liked Freya. But then he caught her looking at Loki with _eyes_ and he made sure to remind her that Loki was his husband.

She just smiled and laughed at him. Like she knew better than to make an advance on Loki.

But she won him over a few years later. And became one of their close friends.

Thor and Loki both got older and before they knew it twenty years had gone by and they were turning into old men. (Not that Thor would ever tell Loki. He valued his nights with his partner).

One such night was during Thor’s thirty fifth year. He was sleeping peacefully even though Loki stole the blankets again and was hogging the pillows. Loki had been ruthless on the battlefield and now he was just as ruthless with their bed at night.

But Thor let him. Loki had been out late with Baldur and Freya ending a dispute between the minor clans in the area. Apparently once they had seen Loki they had all decided to get along with each other. Loki’s reputation was still quite a legendary thing.

But now Loki was really tired and sleeping peacefully. Thor had his eyes open and wondered what had woken him when he heard it again.

“Dad.”

And there beside the bed was their daughter. She was five years old and very delicate. Her blue eyes were wide in the darkness and she held her arms out like she expected Thor to pick her up.

Thor held a finger to his lips and looked over where Loki was sleeping. He was still hogging all the blankets and a bit of smoke was trailing out of his mouth as he muttered in his sleep.

The fact that Loki now felt so relaxed around Thor as to not wake up with Thor’s movements was truly a miracle.

“You don’t want to wake your Father.” Thor whispered. “He’s very tired and needs his sleep.”

Bruna nodded but she smiled as Thor got out of bed and picked her up. Good thing Thor had thought to dress before bed. It would not do for their daughter to see him naked.

Thor carried her out to the kitchen and let her sit at the table. “Are you having trouble sleeping?” He asked gently.

She nodded. “I was worried about Father.”

Thor smiled gently. Bruna was an orphan from Loki’s clan. Her parents had been killed when she was two during an attack on their settlement and Thor and Loki had decided to adopt her and raise her as their own. And she was absolutely adorable. She had pale skin and black hair just like Loki, but her eyes were the prettiest blue. Since her biological parents had died in battle though she worried about Thor and Loki every time one of them went to deal with a threat.

“Father returned completely unscathed.” Thor said as he made her a little cup of tea. Just like Loki, she loved the stuff. “Aunt Sif thinks he’s the best warrior in all the world. She’s jealous.”

Bruna’s smile was proud. “That’s because he _is.”_ She said. “No one can defeat Father.”

She looked up at Thor when he put the cup in her little hands. “You’re strong too Daddy.” She whispered as almost an afterthought.

“Thank you.” Thor laughed. He patted her on the head gently. “I love you so much.”

“I love you too! And Father and Uncle Baldur and Uncle Helblindi and _even_ Aunt Sif.” Bruna said.

Thor could see light out the window. It’d be useless going to sleep now so they might as well get up and ready for the day.

“Do you want to get dressed and help me make breakfast for Father?” Thor asked.

Bruna’s eyes were wide as she nodded excitedly. “Father doesn’t like it if I cook. He says that I don’t have to grow up to be someone’s housewife just because I’m a girl.” She said. “Father wants me to be happy.”

That last bit was completely true. There wasn’t anything Loki really wanted more than for their daughter to be happy. And Loki didn’t ever want Bruna to feel the stifled position the women in his clan used to feel. Loki wanted Bruna to grow up to be strong and independent.

“We won’t tell him you helped me.” Thor winked.

Bruna happily did everything Thor taught her in the kitchen and before they knew it breakfast had been made. They both waited for Loki to wake up giddily.

Bruna might not share any blood with either of them, but she was happy like Thor had been as a child. And once she saw Loki walk into the kitchen she launched herself at him.

“Father! Welcome home!” She said as Loki lowered himself to hug her.

“Good morning Bruna.” Loki said as he embraced her. “Have you and Dad made breakfast?”

“Yes we did! But don’t worry, I didn’t help. I just told Dad what to do. I was the boss.” Bruna said in a soothing tone.

Loki picked Bruna up and went to look at what she and Thor had made. “This looks very delicious Bruna.” He praised.

As Loki brushed by Thor he pressed a kiss to his cheek and then they all sat down.

Bruna asked Loki all about the mission he’d been on and Loki gave her the child friendly version.

“And then I blew some fire at the Alfs and they scurried like ants to do as I told them.” Loki said proudly.

“I hope one day I can breathe fire just like you Father!” Bruna said.

“Don’t you like Dad’s weather seidr?” Thor asked in amusement.

Bruna turned her nose up. “It’s boring.” She said. “You can make it thunder and lightning. But _Father’s_ is so much cooler.” Bruna said.

Thor couldn’t help laughing. “I agree.” He said.

Thor looked down at the gold wedding band adorning Loki’s finger and he smiled to himself. He never thought he was going to be successful with winning peace. Much less winning this life. But it was well worth it.

Thor had been born into a world where the Jotnar and the Aesir hated each other so fiercely they would kill each-others children. Now a Jotunn and an Aesir were married and raising a child together.

The War hadn’t managed to take his happiness.


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Marriage of Rival Clans (Loki POV)

Loki didn’t know what to think about the boy who was watching him like a creep in the forest. First of all, the guy was taller than the plants he was trying to hide behind. And it’s really hard to camouflage when your hair is the color of sunshine.

But he was nice looking and didn’t interrupt Loki when he was reading a fairy tale to him. And he was kind. Something Loki had been lacking in his life recently.

Ever since his Mother had died a year ago Loki had been really lonely. And all everyone told him was just to keep practicing. Practicing killing people. So that when Laufey let Loki loose on the battlefield he could be equal to the Aesir scum.

The Aesir thought they were so high and mighty. With their famed healing seidr they thought that they should protect the world from the Jotnar. They thought the Jotnar were full of murderers and thieves and it was their job to defeat and destroy them. Like the Jotnar chose to kill people with the freezing death.

But did they ever think that Loki hadn’t wanted to inherit the freezing death? That Loki didn’t want the best illusory powers? And Loki had certainly never wanted to breathe fire.

Loki’s seidr was just the strongest. And he had to resign himself to a lifetime of killing and battling.

It had been heartbreaking watching his Father become a shell of the man he had once been. The old Laufey would have never treated his sons like weapons. He had loved them. But after Farbauti died it all changed. Loki had to train all day and take care of his little brother and it was all getting to be so much.

Loki had taken to sneaking away into the forest to get away from his murderous Father and scheming older brother.

When he had met the strange giant blond boy. Loki couldn’t help liking him.

Especially after Thor had been kind to him after he’d been wounded. In reality their little afternoon together had salvaged Loki’s sanity. He had been so sure that he was going to die in that battle with the Vanir and when he didn’t he hadn’t been able to sleep or rest.

The battles got easier after that first one. Partly because Loki naturally was growing more adept at his own seidr, and partly because Thor had convinced him that this pipe dream of a peaceful world was possible.

Watching Helblindi cry in front of their Mother’s gravestone and then look over at Loki with wide eyes had made Loki want peace more than anything. He couldn’t stand his little brother looking at him like that. Like Loki wouldn’t return to him.

Loki didn’t know what clan Thor was from. Any of them, the Alfs, the Vanir, The Midgardians, but Loki hoped in his heart that Thor wasn’t a part of the dreaded Aesir.

Thor had been an Aesir.

Finding out had broken Loki’s heart. And then Loki had had to fight Odin and Hodr off. Loki had never felt such betrayal. If Thor had believed in peace, then why had he let his Father and Brother come hurt Loki?

Loki could only surmise that Thor couldn’t be trusted. His Father and Byleistr had always been right when they said that the only people Loki could trust were Jotnar.

And then Loki became the Clan head and he had so many responsibilities. Loki had been the youngest clan head in history, and that fact made him happy.

It had been difficult not thinking about Thor. That stupid blond oaf had been the kindest person Loki had ever met. And he had turned out to be untrustworthy.

So Loki turned his attentions to the wars. He trained his warriors to fight the best and slowly they had less people dying. He had to go out and join every single battle, and he had to kill so many people. What made it worse is when he had to start fighting Thor.

Thor would always look at Loki with this sad and broken expression when he saw Loki on the battlefield. Like he was sad. It would always send a little jolt of pain through him. But Loki couldn’t afford feelings like that. This was the world they lived in. Aesir and Jotnar couldn’t be friends.

And then Loki killed Hodr. Loki hadn’t actually meant to kill him, he had just sent the flames thinking Hodr would dodge like usual. But he didn’t and he died. Loki killed Thor’s brother. After that Loki knew that forgiveness and peace was impossible. How could Thor ever forgive Loki for killing his brother?

Over time, the war took his happiness and started replacing it with sadness.

Odin, the one eyed scourge of the Aesir managed to slay Byleistr. But not before Byleistr completely mangled Odin’s spine, making sure that none of the Aesir healing techniques could save him.

Loki wanted to cry when he buried Byleistr. But he couldn’t look weak in front of his people. They needed a strong leader. And Loki would make sure that they had one.

Then Thor became the AllFather of the Aesir. The reports Loki received told him that Odin died from the wounds Byleistr gave him. Loki hoped that Byleistr was happy with the news.

Thor started sending Loki ceasefire requests. But Loki just sent them back. How could he trust Thor after what he had done? How could Loki know that Thor really wanted peace between them? What if Thor was only trying to lull Loki into a false sense of security? No. Loki couldn’t take the chance.

So they fought.

Until one battle. Beforehand Helblindi had been acting strange.

“Are you sure you don’t need help?” He kept asking as Loki gathered his weapons.

Loki shook his head. “I don’t. Much less would I need the help of a child.” Loki said. “Stay here with Jarnsaxa. Everything will be okay. I’ll come back like I always do.”

But Helblindi didn’t listen and snuck away from Jarnsaxa.

And when Loki turned around in the battlefield and saw Helblindi falling down with blood pooling out of his chest something snapped. Instead of just fighting Loki started killing. He killed Volstagg, and any Aesir that dared approach them.

And as Loki held his little brothers body he felt the ground shaking and knew it was his doing. But he couldn’t help it. He had failed at protecting the only other member of his family. He hadn’t wanted to go on with the wars any farther. He didn’t want to keep fighting Thor. He wanted to die along with Helblindi.

But then Thor had done something no other Aesir had done.

He healed Helblindi and saved his life. Loki had been absolutely flabbergasted. And then he had cried for the first time in years later when Helblindi opened his eyes.

Loki accepted the ceasefire.

And then Loki made himself sit through those peace talks. Even though Sif and Fandral glared at him every chance they got. Even though Skadi didn’t trust the Aesir at all. And even though he had to leave Helblindi alone.

Then Loki went to Thor’s house a week later. He only went to apologize for Hodr’s death and to tell Thor that he had really meant it when he said that he wanted to forgive all the war crimes.

Crying like a baby and spending the night with Thor were not part of the plan. Nor was having breakfast together and meeting Thor’s mother.

When Thor showed up at Loki’s house a week later with some flimsy excuse Loki just let him in. Helbindi hid behind a shield for the first few minutes but Thor eventually won him over.

Thor and Loki fell into another routine. One of them went to see the other once a week and it worked very well for a year. One week Loki arrived at Thor’s house to find Thor inside with a wrapped present.

Loki hadn’t seen Thor looking that giddy in years.

“What is in there?” Loki asked in a monotone as he crossed his arms.

“Open it!” Thor almost jumped up to give Loki the little wrapped box.

Grumbling under his breath Loki unwrapped the box to find a… bracelet.

Loki held it up with his delicate fingers and examined it. It was absolutely lovely. All made with the finest beads and on a sturdy thread. It was also small enough to not fall off of Loki’s wrist.

“I hope you still like wearing jewelry.” Thor said as he scratched his head and blushed.

“I love it.” Loki said as he put it on his wrist. He reached up to his neck and pulled something from beneath his shirt. Thor’s eyes widened when he saw that Loki was wearing the pendant he had made five years ago. “I kept it. It was my favorite gift.” Loki said.

Loki found himself swept into Thor’s arms as Thor kissed him. Loki couldn’t help giggling as Thor carried him off to the bedroom. They were both thankful that Baldur had left for Frigga’s house.

The next morning Thor was tracing some of the scars on Loki’s shoulder when he spoke.

“Have you thought about our clans living together?” Thor asked.

Loki opened his eyes all the way. He’d had them half-lidded as Thor had been tracing his shoulder. “Thor. Don’t be ridiculous. Our clans might be allied, but they won’t live together.”

Thor pursed his lips. “You say that, but Helblindi and Baldur get along. How different would it be with everyone else?”

“Helblindi is still a child. The adults would hardly be okay with sleeping so close to an Aesir.” Loki yawned.

“I think it’s a good idea. And just think, we wouldn’t have to make up excuses to go see each other.” Thor said brightly.

Norns he was such a morning person. “Thor. You have peace and an alliance. Your dreams came true, now let’s go back to bed.”

But like always Thor managed to get his way. And two years later both the clans were living together. Loki didn’t even know what magic Thor had pulled to make Loki’s people agree but he didn’t question it.

Loki expected judgmental looks from both the clans when he and Thor moved in together. Maybe a few snotty looks from the men and he definitely expected to be challenged to a duel by Sif. But instead people enjoyed gossiping about them. And the rumors weren’t even very mean spirited. They were just excited about the prospect of their leaders being in love.

None of Thor’s people seemed remotely surprised when they delivered Thor messages and Loki was sitting on the couch reading. And Loki’s people didn’t care that Loki was once again wearing jewelry.

It was so strange to fight each other for so long and then finally –finally—be allowed to live together.

Thor made good on his promise and let Loki fill their house with books and he got Loki all kinds of jewelry to wear. It was the nicest thing anyone had ever done for Loki.

Helblindi and Baldur lived with them and they became an odd little family. And Loki found that life made him happy for once.

The years began to pass, and some days were definitely better than others. Their clans didn’t mesh together peacefully immediately and they both had their fair share of sorting out they needed to do. But when Helblindi grew up and didn’t have to go to war Loki realized that all the struggles made it worth it.

And so, one night Loki was sitting outside their house during his twenty-fifth year. He had met Thor ten years ago and in that time they had managed a revolution. The Vanir were in talks with them about a possible alliance and Loki hoped that they would accept it.

Loki never thought that he would live to be this age. Byleistr hadn’t even made it to this age. He had died at the age of twenty one. Loki thought he would die years ago and now that he had this life it felt almost surreal.

Loki was sipping on some tea and watching the lights on all the distant houses turn off as the people went to sleep. What a nice place he and Thor had created.

He couldn’t help wondering though. If Thor would want to keep up their living situation. Thor might want a wife someday and biological children around that weren’t Loki’s younger brother. Thor couldn’t really do that with Loki around.

Loki thought about marrying a woman and having children and he instantly dismissed the thought. He didn’t want to do that. His Mother had died in childbirth, Loki could hardly marry just to have children. And if he married anyone other than Thor it would be a sham marriage. Loki wouldn’t ever marry anyone else.

“Are you keeping watch?” Thor asked as he stepped outside. He had a blanket in one hand and a teapot in the other. He laid the blanket over Loki’s shoulders and refilled Loki’s tea cup before sitting next to him.

Loki looked down at the dainty little cup. When did they get so domestic?

“More or less.” Loki said as he leaned back against Thor. “Watching the town and thinking.”

“Oh?” Thor asked.

“I’m four years older than Byleistr was.” Loki said absently. “And you are five years older than Hodr. Do you think they would be proud of this?” Loki gestured to the sleepy settlement in front of them.

“I think they would. Baldur and my Mother are happy. So Hodr would be pleased with that.” Thor said.

Loki hummed. “I was also thinking about your future.”

“You mean ours?” Thor corrected.

“Well I’ve just been thinking that you’re of the age that you must want children. And I have no right to hold you back.” Loki said.

Thor looked confused. “Hold me back? How would you do that?”

“Well it’s just that I’m a man.” Loki shrugged.

“Do you want children?” Thor asked.

Loki shook his head. “After my Mother, I don’t want that. The Jotnar will elect their next leader. I’ve already decided it.”

Thor nodded. “I understand.” He sighed like he was tired with Loki.

Loki turned to glare at him. “What!” He said sharply. “I’m just trying to tell you that you have options!”

“And I’ve been trying to tell you that I want to raise children with you.” Thor fired back.

Loki actually leaned back from Thor like he had been burned. Which was ironic considering which one of them actually breathed fire. “Explain.”

“You don’t have to marry a woman to have a child.” Thor spoke as if Loki was a small child and not a quarter of a century old. “There are a few orphans from our clans and I was thinking that whenever you’re ready we could adopt one and raise it.”

Loki was shocked. He didn’t think they were _this_ domestic. Nor did he think he would ever discuss raising children with a partner.

Loki sipped his tea while he thought. “I don’t know if I’m good enough to be someone’s Father.” He admitted. “Mine was not that great. And I helped kill yours.”

“That’s all in the past.” Thor reminded Loki gently. “I just wanted to see how you felt. We don’t have to do anything yet. You should just know that I’ll marry you whenever you’re ready.”

“What.” Loki demanded. “We can’t get married! We’re both men!”

Thor just waved a hand. “I’m sure I can convince our clans to accept it as a valid marriage. After all, I did convince them to live here.”

Loki’s mouth was open and he was sure he looked like a fish. But then he laughed.

“Very well. If you can manage to convince Skadi and Jarnsaxa and _Angerboda_ that you should marry me before my twenty sixth birthday then I’ll let you.” He smiled.

Thor’s eyes were bright with the challenge. “I can do that easily. You should start picking out your ring.”

Sure enough Thor managed to convince them all. Loki almost skipped to the smiths when he and Thor went to get their rings made. The wedding ring wouldn’t be just any piece of jewelry, it would symbolize how much they loved each other.

The years passed and they adopted Bruna. Which was the best idea Thor had ever had. Loki wasn’t going to adopt the girl, but when Thor found out she didn’t have any other family he offered to have her move in with them.

Loki had never loved anyone like he loved Bruna. She and Thor quickly became his entire world. She was delicate and gentle but had such an independent soul. And the fact that she was a Jotunn was absolutely wonderful. Loki was so glad that Thor was fine with her being Jotunn.

Over the years he and Thor adopted two more orphans. Hela, a seven year old girl whose parents were killed in an attack. She was also a Jotunn and had been very happy to move in with Loki. She had been wary of Thor until he found about her sweet tooth and made her every kind of cake. After that she warmed up to the Aesir leader and after a year stopped calling Thor ‘Thor’ or ‘Clan head Odinson’ and started calling him Dad.

The next child they adopted was a four year old Aesir boy. His name was Modi and Loki expected that he would favor Thor over him. After all, Modi knew about the wars their clans used to fight. But one night while Thor was away Modi was adventuring with friends and got lost in the night. Loki found him in the forest cowering from a bear. With his fire-breathing and night vision Loki was able to slay the animal instantly and in the process earned Modi’s respect. And after a few months, his love.

As the years continued to pass Modi grew strong, and once he was seventeen he accompanied Loki on every single battle. He wanted to protect his Father at all costs and couldn’t imagine living in a world without Loki in it. Loki never told anyone how much it meant to him, every time Modi followed him out to battle.

Loki began to settle in his life, and found that after a time Fatherhood became a part of him. He had thought that the children would hate being raised by two Fathers, and not only that, but the leaders of two differing clans. But their Jotunn daughters adored Thor just as Modi loved and fiercely protected Loki. The children didn’t care that Loki wore jewelry and read books, or that Thor preferred cooking to leadership duties. And they became an odd little family.

Eventually, in Loki’s fifty fifth year his life shifted again. He had been stressed out all week, knowing that Bruna’s due date was fast approaching. Bruna had married a mild-mannered Vanir man and now she was giving birth to her first child.

Loki was waiting outside the room with Thor and their other children. As well as Sif, Jarnsaxa, Baldur and Helblindi. Everyone’s eyes kept glancing at Loki where he was pale and clutching Thor’s hand. Loki couldn’t stop thinking about how his own Mother had died in childbirth all those years ago. Loki hadn’t wanted Bruna to give birth. He’d begged her to adopt or do something else. Just not subject herself to the dangers of childbirth. But she had only caressed her Father’s cheek and said that all would be well.

Eventually Frigga stepped out of the room. “Bruna has given birth to a healthy baby.” She announced. “She’s doing well, and you can come in. But please be quiet.”

Loki let everyone else filter in before him. His heart was beating a mile a minute, but he didn’t want to go in and scare her. He eventually walked in last and saw her sitting in the bed smiling. Her black hair was slick with sweat and pushed back. But in her arms was a tiny bundle.

Loki saw that everyone had left the chair next to the bed empty. The closest seat to Bruna and the baby. She gestured to it as if summoning him. Loki felt Helblindi push him slightly toward it.

“There’s someone I want you to meet Father.” Bruna said when Loki was at her side.

Loki’s heart swelled. He was the first person she was letting hold the baby. Loki looked over at her husband and he only smiled at him. He must know how much Loki had worried about this. What a kind man.

Bruna held the baby out to Loki and he gently took it in his arms and sat in the chair. It was such a small delicate thing. Loki felt tears well up when he looked down at the small being. He guessed from the pink blanket that it was a girl.

Bruna’s hand settled on top of Loki’s hand as he gently caressed the babies face. “This is your Granddaughter.” Bruna whispered.

“She’s beautiful.” Loki felt himself choke out. Granddaughter. He never thought he would have this.

“Do you want to know her name?” Bruna asked.

Loki nodded. The baby already had the characteristic black hair of a Jotunn growing out of its head. She looked so much like her Mother already. Out of the corner of Loki’s eye he saw everyone in the room step closer. Bruna had refused to reveal the baby names until the baby was born. It had been the subject of much gossip.

“Farbauti.” Bruna said.

Loki stroked the baby’s face gently. “It’s a wonderful name.” He said as he felt tears drop out of his eyes. Bruna had named the baby after Loki’s Mother. If only she had lived long enough to see this.

“Hello Farbauti.” Loki whispered to the baby as he kissed her little forehead. “I’m your Grandfather.”

The baby didn’t recognize her name yet. But she opened her eyes and looked up at Loki. She had pretty blue eyes and seemed curious about Loki. But then she just sighed and burrowed closer to him. As if already accepting this odd man into her life. Reaching a little hand out to touch Loki’s salt and pepper hair.

Loki smiled down at the little being. She was absolutely wonderful. He couldn’t wait to spoil her rotten and make her jewelry and love her to death.

“Does she want to meet her Granddad?” Bruna asked gently.

Loki looked up and Thor was sitting in the chair next to them. His large hand came up to rest on the blanket. Loki handed the baby gently over to Thor.

Thor held the baby as soft as his muscled arms would allow, and as Loki looked tears gathered at Thor’s eyes. “Hello Farbauti.” Thor whispered as he held the baby close. “You’re so beautiful.” He cooed to her. “I’m your Granddad, and I’m going to love you forever.” Thor whispered to the baby as he also kissed her head.

Loki watched Bruna wipe her own tears away as she watched Thor coo sweet nothings to the baby.

Thor handed the baby back to her and wrapped his arms around Loki and wept into his neck. “I never thought I’d be a grandfather.” Thor whispered as he cried into Loki’s hair.

Loki wrapped his arms around Thor and let his own tears fall. “Me neither.” He said.

No one else in the room seemed too fazed by their emotional outbursts. Because they didn’t know how special this was. Aesir, Jotnar and even Vanir were together in this room welcoming a new generation of life into the world.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope everyone enjoyed this story. This is the end.


End file.
